Thursday, December 11, 2008

Always.



I remember that night. I was watching Sisterhood Travelling Pants 2. Right after the movie ended, I cried. I was crying like a baby, like really poured my heart into it, memories passing by untill I have to drink a glass of water to cooled down myself.

I was missing my friends so, much. To tell the truth, these last 5 months, since my new life begins at college, I was lost with my friends. Carmen's situation in the movie seems preety much the same with me in the real life. I was so lost and found it's hard to suite my new life in a different world. Despite the fact that I have spent my 5 years studying in a girl school and with my friends always be by my side no matter what.

I was having a rough time to tell the truth. At first few weeks, you could spot me at the garden, alone, eating my breakfast while waiting the 9 am studio to start. When all the studio's people doing their work at night, I rather drove back home to Kajang and did my work done in my own room.

I was practically back to my lifestyle back at Johor, when I used to arrived at home, where no one was at home exept the keep changing maids. Most of the time my parents were in KL running their office there. I still could feel the feelings it I want to, where when I get back home from school, it is dark and peacefully silent. Where I ate my dinner, alone, in silent. Where I get my work done, alone in my room. It still the same by that time but in this case, it became much worse. At least I have friends during the day and it's okey to be alone at the night because I know I will saw them the day after that. But now?

After a few weeks, yes true I get much better with new friends which how incredibly nice they are. But it never felt the same,like old times. I saw my friends so easy get on with their new life, but not me. It just never felt the same.
The time when my girls and I keep talking louder and louder even in public like no one was there around us.

The time when my friends used to make jokes, I laughed like a mad women untill my stomach was cramped.

The time when I cried because I felt so stupid when my test marks were so much lower than my friend.

The time when I cried, they hugged me to calm me down.

When we were so happy, when we are arguing, when we are mad at each other and more.

There's too much of emotions and feelings to let go. I've known these girl for 5 years. They have known me inside and out. It's just too much for asking me to let go. And by doing a lot of works, my pain started to reduced bit by bit. But after watching the sisterhood travelling pants, the pain just sort of, come back again. It hurts me more to realize that me and my friends were losing in contact. This should not be happened in the first place. And I am trully sorry this is happening to us.

But yes, I told them about this and we made a deal that from now on we will be in contact, always. It's good to hear and in fact we are planning to go on a holiday together. I just can't wait to feel the emotions and feelings when I'm around them again.

These are the friends that has been trough everything with me.

It is true when people said that you have to find true friends and once you found it, make it as your friends for life.

Lots of love to Nad, Nazee and Elya.

Love,
Aishah.

5 comments:

fatin_banana said...

yo aisuuuu~ :)
of course i remember u~
u n ur photos..luv em:P
its so simple n easy to apply the template for ur blog..
wait! u're using XML or HTML??
lemme noe first..:)

cheeeeeeeers~

natto said...

huaa~~~~~~ aisuuuu~~~~~~
i'm sorry~~~
i'm sorry~~~
i'm sorry~~~~~~
i'm sorry~~~~~~~~
i miss u sooo much too!
:((
and i miss all the fun times we had together...

miss eLyA =) said...

awwwwwwww..........

u know....

i kinda cried reading this..

ok ok,i sobbed....

so .. *sob sob..

ok..*wipe wipe...
im ok im ok..

awwwwwww.....

syg........bucuk bucuk aishu..

i miss u too..

and u know my friends here are nothing like u guys!! u guys are the best! and yes.i intend to make u guys the friends for life too baby! coz really,u guys are simply the best bunch ever! and i know that coz well,altho i didnt know u guys for like,5 years,but i keep on changing schools! and i know by far,ur the best.....

he he.. yeah i really miss those times......

uuh uuh!!

cant wait for the trip!!!!!!!

i keep on humming, '19th 19th 19th! we're going!!'
its like a mantra!!

mwah! love u with ALL my shmall-full-of-shisha-smoke-heart..

hehe..sshhhh..dont tell anyone :)

miss eLyA =) said...

uih...alamak...panjangnyie my comment.....

baru prasan....

woooops.. :D

fatin_banana said...

hmm..u better be 100% sure first of what u're using..
im using xml..its more advanced n the designs r kool
i think that u're using html la..